A Letter to Billy Devaney – A Dissection

So, a real attempted letter to Billy Devaney has come into my possession.  Names have been removed to protect the guilty.  His letter is in bold and my responses are below.

Bill,
I have two suggestions,.. PLS read them at least,.. if you don’t like it then just pitch it.

Billy Devaney is not reading this, but I am…does that count?

1)  We are NOT getting a strong push up the middle on Defense.

This is certainly true.  What do you suggest we do?  Draft a DT in the first round?  Run 4 DTs out on the field on running downs?

Why not make the most of Richie Incognito,.. put him on the Defensive side of the ball up the middle and let him wreck the offenses.

Uh what?

He is a wrestlers and wrestlers KNOW how to get and maintain leverage and they Gorilla strong.

Grammatically, I’m not sure what to do with this.  But is ii the Gorillas that can get leverage or the “wrestlers”?  If he KNEW how to get leverage, I think he would be able to use it to get position at guard and not get holding calls.  But Gorillas don’t worry about that kind of thing because they are strong.  So, Richie Incognito is a Gorilla that wrestles other Gorillas?  Or is he a gorilla that wrestles people?  Where is Man vs. Beast when we need it?

Use him where he is NOT handcuffed by holding calls etc.  Defensive guys get paid to wreck and rack!!  PLS!!!!!

Defensive holding. That is all.  I’m also not sure what “wreck and rack” is.

2)  Stephen Jackson.

This is one of my huge pet peeves.  The Rams running back is named Steven Jackson.  Stephen Jackson plays in the NBA.  Two completely different people.

All the potential in the world and I finally found why he is a putz 50% of the time,.. he idolizes Barry Sanders!

My idol is Louie Armstrong, does that mean I’m incapable of writing about the Rams without playing the trumpet?  Nope.  You can idolize people that do different stuff that you do.

Barry has skills Stephen can’t even dream about.  Stephen is a Czonka/Riggins/Frank Gore kind of runner.  He needs to hit the hole as quick as he can get there and keep going North and South.  At least half his plays are putz because he starts friggin stutter stepping.

Steven Jackson has had some stutter-stepping problems in the past, but that is usually when his offensive line is unable to keep defending players from the backfield.  Or when the offensive line doesn’t open a good enough hole for Jackson to run through.  I don’t think stutter-stepping ruins most of his runs.  A lack of offensive line push and occasional bad hole choice causes trouble for Jackson.

He needs new idols that more emulate his skill set, IMHO.  Pls talk to him before we are in Jan with 2 wins again.  PLS!!!!

Wait, so you want Billy Devaney to talk to Steven Jackson and have him change his personal idols so that he will stop stutter-stepping.  I promise you that Jackson is not delaying in the backfield because he wants to be more like Barry Sanders.  I think Steven knows that he’s not Barry Sanders even if he looks up to him.


Rabid Fan

Joe Smith

Yes.  Rabid like a Gorilla.


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4 Responses to “A Letter to Billy Devaney – A Dissection”

  1. […] want to be Billy Devaney? Well, Jeff at Ramsgab did. An actual fan letter, with his responses. Are we still at the point of saying Stephen Jackson? Really, come on […]

  2. […] want to be Billy Devaney? Well, Jeff at Ramsgab did. An actual fan letter, with his responses. Are we still at the point of saying Stephen Jackson? Really, come on […]

  3. JohnnieWarthawg says:

    How the hell do you comment on THAT??

  4. RamsHerd says:

    It’s funny, the Richie Incognito suggestion. I was just reading an article about another hot-tempered offensive lineman, and it was saying that he didn’t fit the basic temperament for the position. Defensive linemen, by comparison, are allowed — encouraged, even — to let their tempers fly as they pin their ears back and go. However, the article in question
    (and I wish I could remember where I found it) didn’t mention anything about requisite super Gorilla strength.

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